(TW Baby Loss)I've been what I would consider a successful entrepreneur for about 5 years. Before that, I was trying different businesses but without much success.I had a traumatic life event that kicked me into a dark hole 5 years ago, but, I somehow climbed out of it and it led to start my first successful eCom brand that I'm still (somewhat) running today.About 4 months ago, I experienced another traumatic life event. But this one was different. It was magnitudes more traumatic than the one I experienced in 2016.In May of this year, I made a tough call but I decided to wind down my business as it was too crazy and demanding on my time. I was on pace for a 50K month in April.. I was pregnant at the time and I knew with my son arriving in May I couldn't sustain this. I really tried to baby proof my business but I wasn't able to outsource and improve all the systems I needed to before then...Unfortunately just a few days after my due date I woke up one morning and I couldn't feel him move anymore. My son was born still a few days later (I'll link the full story here if interested https://ift.tt/2XkYnVy was no reason found for why it happened. What happened to me and my son was incredibly rare. I've never felt so unlucky in my life. Finding out at the hospital through an ultrasound that he was no longer alive was the worst day of my life. I was expecting the best day and was met with the absolute worst. I've never gone from such a high to such a deep low...Since then, I do feel I'm on the right path forward. I'm getting better. But it's been hard to pick up where I left off with my business.I closed it for 3 months. It's been slow rebuilding sales through email, ads, and it's been hard believing that I can rebuild and get this business back up on its feet. It's been a really good profitable business for me, but the niche isn't something I'm super passionate about. I saw an opportunity and went for it. I know I've overlooked or not spent time in certain areas that would have made it easier to get back up and going (more time in new product development, organic traffic, brand ambassadors and influencers.. there's a lot of missed opportunities). I take full responsibility for that, sometimes I just focused too much on sales instead of building something more sustainable. Something I've struggled with in the past too is just feeling like a fraud - it's been hard to infuse myself into the brand because I don't quite fit into the niche..I'm an optimistic person, or at least I was. My values and beliefs that served me as an entrepreneur have been completely shattered. It's been hard working because I feel I'm in this constant state of slight negativity. Anything I work on, my head undermines it.Im also struggling with having a vision for my business and life that I can work towards. I've been journalling about this and in doing so ive realized it's because I have so much uncertainty in my future. The most unexpected thing happened and now I'm so uncertain about everything. It's left my questioning everything. I don't even know how much time I have here. My son's life was cut so short. So when I try to think about where I'd like to be 6 months, 1 year or 5 years from now, its just hard to have hope and feel positive about the future because I know now anything can happen in an instant and completely derail life.Ive been able to overcome past trauma, and somehow come out stronger. I don't even know how I survived the first part of this recent trauma of losing my baby boy. I went from setting up his nursery to picking out a casket. How is this my life? People keep saying I'm the strongest person they know. But I feel weak inside...I was wondering if any of you fellow entrepreneurs have any advice.. I truly hit rock bottom, I'm climbing out slowly. But, if my life and business were a video game I feel I'm at level hard. How can I compete and succeed when I just still feel so down. The odds feel against me and I know if I somehow overcome this, I will overcome the greatest challenge in my life.. it feels like I'm climbing Mount Everest right now (the slowest and hardest climb..)... if you're still reading this.. thank you..Would love to hear any past hurdles (business or life) that you've been able to overcome and how you were able to overcome it.. see hubwealthy.com/wealthy
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